喜欢

It's been three years since I had that feeling.

I was reading a friend's blog about liking someone, having a crush on somebody. It feels so mysterious yet so exciting as how she described her feelings. And as I read hers, I felt like my feelings back then all came back.

It was those times, when I felt that I liked him, that he did not realised it. And it was so funny back then, because, my friends were trying very hard to persuade me to talk to him more often. To interact with him. But for some reason, whenever you start to like someone, even though he was a friend before this, you felt like you've just met him. You start being polite, you start blushing, you start smiling for no reason whenever he did something stupid or something heroic.

Likewise, whenever he got himself in trouble or was injured (he was easily injured, soft bones I think), I get troubled, and would always sms him to tell him to be careful with himself, and back then, I was sms-ing in Mandarin. That probably kickstart my proficiency in that language. The craziest stunt I did back then was that, I rushed to Astaka stadium just to see him. And I didn't have the car, I was rushing with the LRT, and the Rapid KL. But in the end, I didn't get to, because apparently he got himself injured, again. You should've seen my face back then, I was so sad and disappointed yet worried for him, I couldn't really smile when I get back home, not to mention tired, rushing for nothing.

And I was so silly that I keep telling people to keep it a secret. =.= Sigh, why la I was so silly. Sheesh, even now when I looked back I felt so embarassed. It feels like, it was a now or never thing. If I don't do it now, I'll never be able to. (Which is quite true, I really never had rushed for Ephyon yet). And err, urgh, I wrote love letters ><. (WTF so TOP SECRET thing also I'm revealing it to the world!!) One I gave it on Valentine's Day (WTF SO JAKUN! I SCARED HIM LA MORE LIKE) and the other on his birthday (EVEN WTF!). I remembered I gave him a keychain, because back then, his pencil box had alot of different keychains that were given by different people and friends, and I wanted to be that part of him, and also because I thought he liked keychains. And well, back then, a secondary student's precious treasure would be the pencil box other than the handphone.

I still remembered what I carved, it was a pure silver keychain, specially laser engraved, I wrote his name, together with his English name, Alex. It was not a name suited for him back then, but since he used Alex for his signature, I just stubbornly added in it. I wished him all the best in everything. And true enough, he did put that keychain on his pencil box! XD. That action alone made me happy enough for a week. (WTF I know, I'm damn stupid like that. What to do, deprived of love from the opposite sex, just want attention siot) I wonder whether does he still had that keychain at his pencil box? or his carkeys? Or maybe, he'll just keep it as memories?

Of course there was also one incident that stemmed from my crush for him. It was a rather painful incident no one wanted to remember, but since there are no longer any harm feelings (except for one bastard which I will not elaborate further because he's not worth elaborating), I guess I could speak it out. The thing is, when it was nearing Sports Day, I had to march for the Red Crescent Society, and due to my own carelessness, I fell down from the stairs and I had my knee hit directly to the floor. It was so painful, even when I walk I could only limp. That pathetic. Sigh. I tried to ask the President to let me go, but she couldn't, because there are a lack of members. So during that Sports Day, I was practically standing the whole day, because not only do I have to march, but also I have duty calls. Imagine seeing a limping Red Crescent member skipping to help other players suffering from muscle cramps. =.= so much for rest. It aggravated my pain, but what could I do? Duty calls first.

Anyways, main point was, He was also limping. Because he hurt his knees too. (Mr. Soft bone ish) And waddaya know, it was also the same side of knee (left knee to be more precise). So two people limping like that everywhere, and most of the class gang knew about my crush towards him, sigh. Then before it ended, rumours were spreading all over that I was faking my injury because I love him so much that I should imitate his walking as well. Haiz that was the worst times of my life la. Because no one believed that I was also in pain, especially when he had the bandage and I don't. What more, I've been accused by gossipers and also people whom I thought were friends, that I love to fake things up, and that I'm so perasan (which meant I'm so into myself) thinking that my actions will touched him so that he'll be my boyfriend. Problem is I was so pathetic I didn't defend myself by shoving the doctor's medical bill into their mouths to prove my innocence. I just kept quiet. Sigh. See la, like someone until the feminist in me also weak already. Sad la. If who I am now met up with who I am then, I'll thrust her the medical bill and make them apologise by kneeling down wtf. Thank god the issue was settled after that, although it did hurt my friendship and my perception of those people, especially that one bastard. Oh well.

Of course the painful part came when he told me, after such a long time that he had someone else in mind. My heart shattered, literally. Why I know? I had diarrhea for no reason the next morning. I couldn't sleep as my stomach hurts like hell. And I started to be sick. Unfortunately that next day was Prom night for my school, and to prove that I could be strong, I went ahead, I went and enjoy myself. Not too much cause I saw him and his date dancing T_T. Went back crying, but ah well. Life goes on, that was how my secondary school life ended. Boyfriend-less and love-less. Shit, I was so emo like that. LOLWTF.

It's almost a year and a half now with my current boyfriend. He is very good towards me, but it was never the same like how I liked the other boy. For that boy, I truly made my effort just to get him to talk to me like a good friend without having any results. But for Ephyon, It had always been a good communication. I didn't feel that much of disappointment and pain, because Ephyon reciporated my feelings for him, and that he made me feel special, that I'm capable to walk the path down with him. He made me felt like the one, and I'm truly glad.

And when the boy knows about my relationship with Ephyon, he told me he was glad for me. Also, when we chatted once on msn, he said he cleaned up his room and found my love letters, and he apologised again to me. For hurting me? Maybe. But I did benefit from that hurt. At least, I wouldn't stupidly find somebody who truly is not compatible with me. He told me he already know I'm not suited for him. But I was too blind and deaf to listen. I just kept wanting my feelings to have some response from him, the positive ones I mean.

Bleh, so stupid, but if I didn't go through that phase, I wouldn't have learnt how to deal with people right? In an indirect way, I benefitted from my liking of that boy.

So, to you, and you know who you are, thank you. I just felt like telling my story to people because I want to tell my friend also having this crush that she's not the only one. I know she won't share her stories with me, but at least I want to tell her that I share the same kind of feelings with her. Hopefully she'll read my blog XP. But still, should you happen to read it and you don't want people to know about it, I'll take it down okay?

Thank you again.

P.S: Nah, to all my 5 Alpha-ians, it's a full exposure of what stupid things I did back then wtf. Now your turn to tell something embarassing also. It's a tag wtf nolah just kidding. I hope this answers everything you guys all want to know about those "cindi love alex yer yer yer" times. It's been so long. But three years is a good enough time for me to recover and found my stability then I tell my story. =)

Selangor's 100 days

I believe every Selangor citizens here have witnessed and gone through a hundred days with Selangor under the new government. Boy, our administration sure have many ups and downs. Lots of controversies dug up, lots of new rulings pledged by the government, now known at Pakatan Rakyat, with the Barisan Nasional Officers being the Opposition. It's a different twist for those staying in Selangor. With the 100th day for the Mentri Besar to rule over Selangor, here's a review on how he handles a few of Selangor's problems.

1) Balkis controversy.

Just to enlighten those in the dark, the Balkis is a sub-organisation of Bakti, which the organisation only covers the wives of Selangor's ministers and officials. In some ways, they were the wives' club. Its reason of existence is still unknown till now, as with all the other non-government organisations that spawned everywhere in Malaysia. It "claims" to be doing charity, how true is that we do not know and it didn't matter. What matters was that they transferred money out from their organisation with a total amount of RM10 million because they announced that they will dissolve after knowing the results of the General Election 2008. What more, the money will then be transferred back to Bakti, also known at "First Ladies Club", where the chairman was none other than our beloved Prime Minister's wife, also the First Lady of the country whichever way you see it.

I liked their way of approach of first stopping the transaction of that RM10 million before it flies to the federal monetary fund, then Selangor would also end up to be very poor state lacking of funds to continue developing Selangor even though it is already the most developed state in the country. Even though the Mentri Besar had put drastic action to prevent the money from flowing out, the response and the action taken after that are rather slow. It's not that we didn't want to have a follow up to the investigation, but for some reason the mainstream media decided to seal off reporting the news. What the hell? I say we should have the rights to know where did our money had gone through and why do they think they can just take away the allocation of budget first given to Selangor like that?

I wish to see more of the development about this case. Please do not take your time any longer to find out the cause. Because you will be questioned about that decision of yours. Remember that promise, transparency and clarity.


2) Bandar Mahkota Cheras controversy.

Hark, PUI! This is really the damnation of all controversies. It involves politicians, Federal Reserve Units (aka water spraying men), the angry people, Grand Saga Sdn Bhd, and also thugs. Look at the picture. Lots of bloodshed, lots of tears, lots of problematic issues featuring corruption and cronyism. People are angry, police were there to "instil discipline". Innocent victims arrested, or plummeted by thugs. Thugs and gangsters, they were hired. You'd think these thugs went and beat up the police? Heck no! They beat up any civillians trying to take down the barrier set up by that company, so that the citizens will use the toll instead. Such bastards. But the Mentri Besar, regardless of what he had tried to do, being the largest shareholder of the company, they had a big argument, the CEO of that company stomped out. That is a good sign, but then, they came back with thugs. I think most of the victims are now healed, but they will carry the trauma with them.

Is it really worth that much of money? To sacrifice your good bonds with the people, to make the whole nation know about your crony deeds? To be able to privatise roads, but unable to have ties with the people because it was all for the sake of "profits" and "business"?

This better have an end soon. I'm sure everyone is sick of unnecessary bloodshed.


3) Free water?

Will we or will we not get free water from now onwards? It remains as a question left unanswered. Although our Mentri Besar had announced that each household will enjoy the first 20 cubic metres of free water, many had objected to the decision, as they will not only encourage water wastage, but it also meant the Selangor government will have to subsidise water.

Personally I'm against it, not because of environmental reasons, but monetarily, we are not capable to provide subsidy to the residents that had the population of close to 7.2 million people. What more when the previous administration had wasted almost all the allocation for Selangor meant to be spend within the year, in 3 months? Before the Election was announced. Sounds to me like a conspiracy.

What I propose to the state government is that other than spending your time trying to dig out past crimes commited by the previous administration (which I bet had records dating back to 10 years ago. You want to make them admit to each and everyone of the crimes they commit? That's a waste of time and money), what you need to do is to try and stop building unnecessary roads (unless it was the Federal Government's idea. Typical) and instead garner enough money. I don't know what you could do with it, but free water is definitely not the way.

And by the way, unlike rumours that free water encourages wastage, I beg to differ. How much water can we waste anyway? How many of us would let kids simply just spray water anywhere? Just because it's free it doesn't mean it will encourage wastage. However, I suggest the government had accumulate enough money then you decide what to do.


The Selangor government may not seemed perfect even after the General Election, but granted, it was also very effective to make drastic actions. However, they should try to get to the bottom of some issues, instead of leaving it dangling it like that. Because, just because the citizens do not talk about it often that doesn't mean they've forgotten about it. We still need to know what is going on in the end.

But anyways, Happy 100 days. Hopefully more satisfying results will come up.

I wish...

I read this, before I go to sleep.

The moment I finished, I felt disgusted, frustrated, sad. I couldn't shake off that feeling. And I went to sleep with it. It was nauseous. And I couldn't stand it anymore. I cried. I don't know why I would cry over something so petty.

So I tried to sms Ephyon. And indeed within seconds, he called back. He comforted me for a few minutes, before I started telling him what I felt. Then, he just kept lecturing me, stating how bad it was for me to think like that. He just kept yelling, saying that I'm so silly think of such a thing that could make me cry. He went on going that I can go and visit it later on when I'm independent, when I'm out of the house, when I have the earning power. I kept telling him I don't want to. I'm too embarassed. I'm too old. He told me no one is too old to go and play at Disneyland. I begged to differ. Then, since he couldn't talk me through, he gave up.

Of course I couldn't believe him. I count him as one of those lucky ones. He could go. He already went. What kind of position is he in to lecture me? That was my feelings when I drifted off to sleep.

It's not easy staying in an area of upper middle class, attending an elite (not to mention rich) primary school, and coming back to school dreading to hear about my friends bragging about their trips. But Ephyon, to me, cannot understand.

He was not there, when I was 9, and the teacher I hate the most asked everyone in the class who had been to overseas, and I was the only one not raising my hand. People laughed at me. That bitch teacher poked fun at me. My family income back then fare much better than now. But even a daughter of a vegetable seller, could afford to go to Singapore, and not me. Why?

He was not there, when I was 11, crying alone inside my room, when I finally became one of the top 5 in class, yet my father, said he'll POSTPONE, the Disneyland trip, even though he said he'll fulfil it immediately and said will bring me there during the long school break if I get into the Top 5 of my class. Well, he's already dead. Why me?

He was not there, when I sit alone, watching all the Disney cartoons, slowly, gradually, stop wishing.

No matter what Ephyon or others tell me, that said how bad others' condition are, who have never even sat on a plane, who don't have a passport till now. I can never shake off that feeling of resentment.

Please, just SHUT UP AND LISTEN FIRST BEFORE YOU PENALISED ME AS A SPOILT BRAT OR THOSE WHO COULDN'T APPRECIATE WHAT MY PARENTS HAVE DONE FOR ME! ESPECIALLY YOU, EPHYON! BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!!

If you are SO GOOD at telling me the LAW of the universe, ask my mother why she and my dad do not decide to give me a passport till I turn 18. Oh yes, I could understand. At 1993 when my dad could afford to drive a Toyota, but couldn't afford to let his beloved daughter go overseas? NO! HE, and HIS WIFE, left his CHILDREN AT HOME WITH THE MAID AND GRANDPARENTS, EATING JOJO AND TORA (those chocolate biscuits that have toys inside), WATCHING DISNEY CARTOONS, WHILE HE GO AND ENJOY HIS COMPANY DINNER SHIT!

EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY!

And the worst part of all, even if there was no passport, there was not many travels inside Malaysia either. That was how lazy, or stingy, they were. (Note: These feelings were what I've felt in the past. Everytime anger comes, everytime it start triggering my memories, my feelings will all pour out, so, don't judge me. Don't even try to tell me how wrong I am. These are all my personal feelings)

So great, I just keep waiting and waiting. Even believing my mom's words about "You will get free trips if you go and work. Cause I do that. I don't get to travel when I was young" (FUCK! I was too naive, she could afford it, she's just too stingy, and that was what I thought at the age of 15 because she could send my grandmother for a trip to China). Crying, countless times, over the fact that I don't travel overseas, while listening to my friends talk about those "group" trips? Sigh.

And when I finally turned 18, I was not the only one who get the "upgrade", as in gaining access to go to overseas. My sister and brother don't even have to wait till they're 18. They gained INSTANT ACCESS, the moment I, repeat, I, turned 18!

I don't feel fair! I know I'm the fucking eldest but THIS IS NOT FAIR TO ME! WHY AM I THE ONE, ANTICIPATING TO TRAVEL SO MUCH, WAITING TILL I GAIN MY RIGHTS, AND THEY GET THE INSTANT BOOST RIGHT AWAY?

HUH???? TELL ME MR. ONLY CHILD! TELL ME!

AND YOU WERE THERE LECTURING HOW I THINK I SHOULDN'T BE SORRY OF MYSELF. I DAMN BLOODY HAVE ALL THE RIGHTS TO DO SO!

Because, I hate Disneyland. And I know, that EVEN if I do get the chance to go in the later years, when I have my independence, I would be BUDGETING, PLANNING, to buy my own house, my own car, my own fucking in-house entertainment system, MINE! That's MY reality! I don't NEED YOU to remind me that I could go. At like what? 50? 60? Just walking around the theme park like some asshole cannot able to enjoy the thrilling roller coaster rides? That only could go for rides that sings "It's a small world"??

My Point is, I don't want to go to Disneyland, even if it was a childhood dream. I've grown up. At 20, I will not feel the thrill anymore. I no longer feel like a kid. Even if you shove me to the front of Disneyland, I'll turn back. I don't want to go in. And YOU, can't MAKE ME!

And STOP LECTURING ME about how I should behave, or how I should sympatised with the other people out there who couldn't even go overseas even until now. If you could find someone with the desire to travel so much that he or she could cry, yet do not have the access, and had been SUFFERING, then I believe you. If not, I won't.

So to all the rich bastards, and spoilt brats out there, or lucky ones who had the chance to visit the Disneylands, everywhere, just appreciate it. I know you love the trip. It was everybody's childhood dream, right?

Although, if 10 or 15 years from now, if a boy or a girl that resembled me and said "Please, mommy, can I go to Disneyland?"

Without hesitation, I'll nod. But not for me. For him, or for her.

A lonely review of a great movie

Dear empty space,

I'm filling you up now. I wouldn't know when I'll stop. But this review will have an ending, I'm sure. Because this is where I can pour out my feelings of exhilaration after watching a movie, which no one had interest, nor can I share my feelings with anyone. It is a review that only I will read.

It started with my normal schedule of going to classes. I saw Dylane. My mind flashed. I tried to invite her to come and watch with me a movie worth watching, called "Amazing Grace". She seems intrigued over it, but she said she had other plans. Because our campus was going to show "Stranger than Fiction" and getting reviews and criticism circles. I sighed. It's okay, I told her, I'll just be a lone ranger.

This is the trailer of Amazing Grace:



It is an intriguing trailer for me, as I have found this movie from Edward Ling, political secretary of Hannah Yeoh. However, it was showed at GSC International Screening, which meant two things. It will not be a blockbuster success, and It will be presumed a boring movie. Nobody will be interested to watch what they presumed as lame crap.

I started deducing who would and who wouldn't go with me. Boyfriend couldn't go, he have this music video pitch going on and he had to be in class. I've tried asking others, but, they have their things to do. So, I just booked one ticket for myself, to go and watch it after class.

Class ended early today, and I went to boyfriend's house awhile to send an email, after that it's time to go to the shopping complex. It's pretty jammed, seeing that I went there when everyone else in office was having lunch break. Got my ticket. I saw the seating screen. Seems to me that not many will go and watch a movie of an international screening. Maybe they were afraid it'll be too artistic for anyone's liking. Like those in the Cannes Festival.

Went to a nearby McDonald's and got my usual set meal. I sat down and read the last few chapters of James Patterson. Found a two-seater that was just enough for me to eat. It feels so serene yet lonely. Because movie outings are usually done in groups, or in twos, but I'm so very much a one man show. James Patterson did some tricks though. Very moving story, but I think it was too short. I love a longer chapter to read.

Nearing 2p.m. I went to buy popcorn and mineral water. Cutting down on carbonated stuff now. But I don't think it matters. It's my own health to be looked upon, not others. Waiting for my cinema number to be flashed. And within 5 minutes, I'm in.

Just as what I've expected. Only that few cats and dogs inside the cinema. No one was particularly interested in the film I guess. It was just something to kill off time. I don't know why did I want to watch it so much. Looking for some political inspiration perhaps? I don't know. As I sat down to watch the story unravel, the life, the true story of William Wilberforce, and the origins of the song Amazing Grace.

William Wilberforce was the first English MP to try and convince the Parliament, that the slave trade, which was what built the nation in the first place, should be abolished because, Thousands of African slaves died just by trying to come to Jamaica, to work on the sugar trade. He and his friend, William Pitt, who became a Prime Minister by 24, both political allies. Wilberforce, however, have had alot of objections from the Parliament, as he became one of the first groups of slave abolitionists in England. Yet again, his Bill had time and time and time again been rejected due to the votes made in the Parliament.

15 years later, he became very weak, with sickness, and upon meeting his future wife, Barbara Spooner, who demanded that he relinquished his memories for her, for she was only 22, and was a product of free education, which was what Wilberforce had proposed to the Parliament.

It was revealed in the movie that his friend William Pitt couldn't really help him nor back him up because as Prime Minister, he had to attend to urgent measures, and England at that time were plunged into the war with the French, the French Revolution War as they say. But 15 years later, Wilberforce was convinced that his time has come, as the War is now over and that the people of England were shifting their views back to the immediate issue, slave trade.

He went to find his mentor, John Newton (and also Amazing Grace's lyricist). He found that John is now blind. John Newton used to be a slave trader, and having that he is constantly with death and with these African slaves, he said that 20,000 ghosts were with him. When he was younger, he didn't want to recount his stories of slave trade to Wilberforce, because it was a nightmare to him. But as he is blind, he now feels better to tell it out. Because he knew that as a blind man, he could not weep. And that his nightmares of 20,000 ghosts will not be there. He had also said, "I wished I had remembered those 20,000 names. Because they all have names, beautiful African names." and he weeped, without tears. I was crying too. I felt sad for a man who only dared to relive his moments when only he turned blind. ("I once was blind but now I can see". It's the irony of it.)

Finally, with all the first-hand accounts accumulated by the abolitionists, William Wilberforce, try once again, to push the Parliament to abolish slave trade. And with the votes, 283 MPs agreed to slave trade in contrast to 16 MPs. William Wilberforce finally had his Bill passed as a Slave Abolition Act. It was a poignant moment, possibly the only scene I've seen without emotions and yet I myself was crying. Why did I feel like that? Is it because, for once, I want to see a major change too?

And finally, Lord Charles Fox stood up, and said that some of us may think that Napoleon is a patriot, because he resolves his issues through war, He may be a hero, but he is a war hero. William Wilberforce, on the other hand, was a man of peace. No guns, no battles were used. It was him and his petition. It was his voice, multiply by thousands of support to finally make his dream come true. This was William Wiberforce's dream, to change the world.

Finally the bagpipes version of Amazing Grace were shown to us, 4 centuries after the Act was established. William Wilberforce was a man who fought for freedom, till his death.

I rated the movie 8.9/10. I love the overall storyline, I love the emotions, it seemed proper and accurate. I loved the film so much that I feel like telling it to others. But I thought properly: Who would listen? who would be so politically aware to listen to me, bullshitting about some dead politicians and his actions? who would? No one had the time, or the interest.

Dear space,

I've told what I can. Hopefully, when I read back, I'll fall in love with the movie once more. This is not to be missed. However, this is a lonely movie released in Malaysia, made by a lonely reviewer. Only people with loneliness will go and watch it. I'm one of them.

I love myself for that.

When Bitches Fight

This is really amusing, yet at the same time, thought provoking.

Today is yet another regular day for a day out wif the boyfriend. We went to buy books, purchase stuff, don't bother to catch a movie. And eating as cheap as possible.

The boyfriend suddenly remembered he needs razors so that he can cut himself continue shaving and remain clean shaven. (Damn boyfriend, never want to let me see his ruggedness even though he have alot of hair)

While queuing up to pay, two women in front were arguing. We don't need an expert to know what was going on. One was saying that the other was cutting line and it wasn't fair as the others whom were all queuing up. Thing is, that "other line" was actually another counter, so first woman was wrong.

However, second woman was also defending herself, rubbing it in with a sacarstic tone and smugness. So first woman got quite pissed off and yelled "Shaddap! Shut up!" and second woman was smiling like she was trying to control her anger. Or maybe she was just very pleased with her righteousness.

Me and the boyfriend was shrugging behind, not knowing what the fuss was all about.

But after paying up, I walked out of the store and I looked back at boyfriend, and asked him "Who's the bitch in this argument?"

Without fail, he answered "both."

"True." I said. I wasn't going to defend or bring out the feminism in me to "defend women's rights" or trying to argue that bitch fight was reasonable. I've got to say this, the first lady is a bitch for chiding on people when she had obviously made a mistake, but second lady was almost at the same level as the first for trying to "defend her holy feelings" and rub it in to make the first woman guilty, trying to humiliate her or something like that. Therefore both are bitches.

That kind of reflected the bitch within our hearts. At some point, we just couldn't stand being tread upon, and just want to get what is right, even if it is just as puny as giving us back our sense of pride by buying back the chocolates that somebody has accidentally finished, or getting angry over something small so that boyfriends/husbands/lovers/kanasais will "manja" and "belanja" and "asmara" us back to normal.

Seriously, women are so schizophrenic sometimes. Evil wrath controls the biological clock. Sometimes it only needs something very sensitive and small like a sentence and....

BOOM!

We'll explode. And the victims are mostly those who are surrounding us. The lousiest times of their lives la to be under us which is just as bad as being under a stone. At least a stone won't bring you down with a nagging ring to your ears or threats to rip them off. Or invoking you guilty charges and make you regret your stupid/wrong mistake for the rest of your life.

Oh yes, I'm part of the devil too.

Women. Can't live without them, can't leave without them.

By the way, in that argument, the men of those two bitches women were so quiet. Even the second lady's husband/boyfriend/lover/kanasai want to back her up also he merely raised it in a very annoyed tone, not to make it loud and clear type.

Haiyah, please tell your lover/girlfriend/wife/ah lian to keep it down la. Even if it means to scold her in public. Then she get the message mah.

Of course, I don't guarantee that you can survived not having to receive her other end the moment you reach home ah.

You know why?

It's based on experience. I do that too.

Bitchy bitch bitch bitch.

All women are. No denying.

Yesterday, I've joined the historical jam

By joining several other cars to queue up and pumped my car till full tank after knowing about the news through my mom.

Yeah, finally I understood why my mother kept sighing about petrol rises. When I became a driver, I fully understood what it feels like to have without petrol but yet to be early for class/lecture, now that everything seemed harder, I needed more time to concentrate.

It sure took a long time, but a sudden jump sure sends shockwaves everywhere.

The only ones rejoicing are our neighbours, Thailand and Singapore.

The rest of us? Sighing non-stop over the price.

But hey, it is bound to happen. Them dinosaur oils ain't going to stay there. Heck, if those things don't die, we will not have fossil fuels and petroleum, natural gas even. Instead, we are the fossil fuel to be eaten alive by those monsters.

So how badly will RM2.70 per litre will make us suffer?

No shopping, no car, no mamak, no business, no movie, no courting.

We Malaysians overspend on food, beverages and entertainment sometimes, maybe it is a good time to cut back, maybe share the petrol cost together, maybe take the public transport? (sans Rapid KL's 100% subsidy removal, I'm talking about another bus service)

I do not oppose nor support the fuel price hike.

Let's face it, it just happens. You want to rant? Rant on being stupid. Rant on wasting too much. Rant on just ranting all the way in people's blogs, forums, websites, but no action taken. Rant on using big ass cars just to go to near distance shops to do your shopping. Rant the government. It's what is happening in life. You think you are the only one suffering? The US is also furious about the crazy economy crisis.

And by the way, in terms of electricity, blame the mofo-ing IPPs who rake in money anyway despite we used LESS of the electricity. I've had forwards earlier this year telling me to turn off electricity for one whole hour in conjunction with the Earth Day (or something like that). The newspaper, even highlighted Melbourne's effort to save 10% of electricity in the previous year before that day itself! Spectacular!

Interesting, I thought to myself, finally I could do something to contribute to the world. And as I find more information, I realised that In Malaysia, they will not record any savings for the world, EVEN if we all do turn off the electricity for one whole hour. Why is it you ask? (Why not you find it out HERE? and HERE?)

See? It's already too late to groan or whine. We caused this to happen. The upper hands all knew this is happening. But do we take our asses off to go and get our rights back?

Too late, we forgo our rights to begin with.

And hey, don't look at me. I'm not eligible to vote yet. I will vote for the right person during March 2008. And plus, lets face it. We knew this is coming. Leave the expensive stuff to people who can afford it, we can only dream on and focus on what we can buy. So lets get back to reality while we're at it.

By the way, Senator Clinton ended her presidential campaign. Ah, so sad to see her leave. Her fight with Senator Obama might as well go down to history as the most competitive fights ever in American history.

What's next?

Sheesh

Year Two started, I have two more years left in this university.

I felt like I missed out alot, compare to those who get to study overseas. Those who got the exposure of diverse cultures and point of views.

I used to think I'm very special, being able to analyse issues and view things differently for academic purposes. People can be angry easily about it. I don't.

I was taught "Things happen for a reason", therefore I believe I could, and I hope I could, calmly accept stupidity sometimes.

I wish I hadn't left my studies behind. Now my wings felt limited.

Regardless of heated debates happening inside class, it shall remain inside the class.

No one else will know how I can speak without fear without a channel.

I wanted to try a Public Speaking Competition, but realised their titles given were too atrocious, and that if possible, I want to have free flow of titles so that I get to choose my own topics.

Yes, I know Public Speaking is not just about the interesting topics, but our mannerisms, posteur, signalling and whatnot.

There are also Essay competitions, however, I couldn't bring myself to sit down and write according to the theme. Again, the limitations are just like a barrier confining me inside. I just couldn't write with a theme. And only ONE theme there.

Pfft, I hate staying inside this boundary. If there is that one chance for me to soar, I will be ready.

I don't want to hesitate before losing my chance again.

I don't give myself a schedule. I know what are my chances and interest. I just have to retain it by being active.

I want to be my own legend.

I'm down but not out....

Give me a few days. Let me revive.....

Whoa, so many things coming in! part 2

Ah, second thing happening would also be counted as a national issue, a national women's issue. (Sorry it took such a long time, can't seem to tore my eyes of games, but I assure you this round this post will be a much longer one). But in spite of the absence I've read so many about the case of Munirah Bahari and her proposal of saying Malaysian school uniform for girls are too sexy. (Read HERE)

I've read all sides of stories (Read HERE for all of them), but the funniest has got to be this blogger/author May Zhee and her voice getting heard. And she said women can go naked on the streets and the men had no rights touching them. Of course I'd give her compliments for, once again, voicing out women's agony, rights, and how men are total bastards, those were very good points, but that sentence totally made me go HA!

What the heck is all this? First, despite all the anger raised by various bloggers around the world, I would like to point out that these people are rather short-sighted. From the way I read the article, I would have been angry about her. Look at how the report shows it, and the way her rearrangements of words. First, Munirah Bahari said that the school uniforms are sexy because their white blouse are transparent and thin, the men would be seduced, it encouraged rape and premarital sex.

Congratulations for noticing that. However, my dear, men also have that quality of blouses. And worse still, they do not bother to cover up their nipples. Men's nipples are also a turn-on for women, so shouldn't you look at that as well? Plus, I see many guys who pulled their pants down below the waist, to show their ass around. Oh shoot, they must be provoking the girl students to touch and slap their ass. Kinky.

And secondly, Munirah made once again another mistake, by generalising RAPE and PREMARITAL SEX as the same issue. HELLO? Since when it can be viewed as the same women issue? It should be separate thoroughly because they are of different stages. Of course I do notice most people just pick on the rape part of the article. It's so sad that they have remained hidden in some blogs but it doesn't matter. Anger does make people do things blindly. If premarital sex happens, that'll be the fault of both sides. If Rape happens, humph, that depends. Sometimes it was the girl's fault, but most of the time rape happens outside school boundaries, hence proving your points yet again, false.

Thirdly, which is in your blog, you have claimed that several teachers sighed and complained that they find it hard to concentrate on teaching because they looked at the girl student's blouse which are too transparent. My dear dear woman, did you ask how attentive they were when they looked inside the uniforms and what colour was the undergarment?

Come on, wake up la. If they could even know the colour of the bra, that means they are paying too much attention to the girls. Hence they should be labelled as perverts. It's just the same for some teachers who have too much time to look underneath girl student's skirt and see what colour of panties have they worn, or whether have they wore shorts below it. (Which unfortunately, I have had that experience before. Hence after that experience, I don't wear skirts anymore). My gosh, Munirah, I'm surprised that you're able to escape unharmed by being with those people around.

That is why many of them chided her for making women as, once again, the one to be blamed for everything that happened. I guess there is nothing to it. I would have said kudos for the people to speak up, because if you want to review uniforms, review BOTH male and female ones. And once again, the women now are not weak. Sure they may be beaten and scarred, but we remained standing anyway and voice out our opinions, as proven by yourself too. But again, thank you for speaking up Munirah, but this is not the issue to be discussed.

Oh and for that naked street thing, I'll just laugh it off. Sure, women may be able to walk around naked and men have no rights to touch them. But, men have all the rights to LOOK at those women, ABSORB the beauty of them, heck even Take Pictures of these beauties and they can go back and wank it off or distribute it on the net. Silly excuse. They don't need to touch the naked women, for if the women do go naked publicly (like those PETA demonstrators sometimes), that means they are bold, or neurotics. So what can you debate about this hmm?

Fuh, now that's done, please take your time to enjoy a few videos.








Okay I'm done. New semester starting tomorrow! Toodles.

Whoa, so many things coming in! 1

Where do I even start updating?

Damn

Oh whoops. I did sound like I love pessimistic stuff happening right? Sorry, Journalistic nature. It's hard to admit, but bad news are good on the papers.

*cough*

So anyways, lets get the reviewing session over and done with!

The whole nation has been talking about it, it's almost as if it's a new rave. Dr. Mahathir's resignation from UMNO sends a message to all Malaysians.

"I'm making a grand exit"

Okay that's probably not in his context but seriously, this man had been in the spotlight since 1969 (You'd think I've forgotten the saga you pulled off that prompted Bapa Kemerdekaan Tunku Abdul Rahman to resign? No way Tuan!). After 31 years he just couldn't stop didn't he?

And according to his blog post HERE, he said that the UMNO that he had known 62 years ago was no longer there, and that now this party exists to only make current Prime Minister Abdullah Badawi glorious, so does his family, and that no one else are willing to talk to him.

I would like to point out, Tuan, that the UMNO you had known DIED the moment you established the UMNO Baru, 20 years ago (Read HERE and HERE for more information), hence, you are member no.1. If it is really the UMNO you love so much that was 62 years ago, UMNO founder Dato Onn Jaafar will be member no.1. So to put it accurately, the UMNO you have known was 20 years ago. Not 62 years, despite the fact that you joined the original UMNO when Dato Onn Jaafar founded it. That is because the Registrar System does not recognise the UMNO that Tunku Abdul Rahman and Tun Hussein Onn has found.

You acted like a giant towards Tunku Abdul Rahman, but he was, and still is, the man who made Malaysia possible. And yet, you denied a second chance for them. I bet your words then was "There can only be one UMNO, and this UMNO shall it be". You turn your back against two of your predecessors, heck, I think you might have thought of them as old farts not worthy of your attention at all. They, together with Dato Onn Jaafar, died as an outsider of UMNO, and people were so worried you are to be the next one in history. I'd say, Karma gets back at you, Tuan, because how you treated them, will be treated back at you like that.

I have profound respect for you, because without violence, you manage to topple any competitor eyeing your throne. Oh yes, it's a very hard feat to remain on the seat for 22 years as Prime Minister, even British ex-PM Tony Blair didn't last long, and certainly not Australian ex-PM John Howard. However, within these realms there exists people who were too young to recognise the fear implemented by you. Just wait, and soon, your views will be all washed out. Cronyism does not stay.

Tuan, all I can say is that you have to just accept the fact that no one listens to you now. No matter what, you remain as a past. There is no way it will become the PM era you have gave. My regards to you Tuan.

Other posts to be continued at the next post because it's now 1.10am and I want to sleep.

I have a bone to pick

No seriously, I have a really major bone to pick from all these countries. All the so-called holy charity organisations. I would say the culprits would be, China and Myanmar.

I read with full disgust over what lacklustre action these government showed over them. First, the Cyclone Nargis which killed almost nearly 30,000 people staying in Myanmar. Then all the aid comes in. I'll reprimand the fucked-up government first before I go and reprimand the stupid charity organisation.

Apparently, according to this news, This military junta turned the aids into a force whereby they campaigned and HELD ELECTIONS then the people will receive the help whereever they can.

See anything wrong here people? These bastards, mix politics and charity together! What kind of nonsensical insanity is this?

Folks, this is the true example of a desparate attempt to continue to stay on politics despite the tragedy that struck the country.

This is the true example of a group of greedy bastards who wants to save their sorry ass before others.

THIS IS THE TRUE EXAMPLE OF WHAT BUDDHISM PREACHED THAT NEVER TRANSCEND TO THE EARS OF THE CURRENT CORRUPT PEOPLE!

I have long been trying to refrain from speaking about the military junta because of Aun Sung Suu Kyi. She's the pioneer and that ray of hope that a democratic Myanmar is possible. But this scene is really pushing the limits. Seeing their ignorance and their gleeful smile as every ballot cast to them, they only have to give out a quarter of what they already have to these people so that they can continue enjoying the so-called power in their hands. Ah, the feeling of ruling over people always feel good don't it?

But being a heartless bastard while doing it will not feel good. Don't even try to seek religious guides, seek within your own conscience and think whether is it appropriate to let the people suffer. Or maybe are you as clueless as our Prime Minister who saw NOTHING about the suffering until you yourself feel it?

If not, may you die in hell. There's nothing I can say about you.

Oh yes, and China too. The Earthquake that they have suffered, from within. Many of them were cut off due to the rubble. So many others suffered over China's earthquake. 7.9 magnitude. And you know what? It happened when China was about to celebrate the countdown of the 100th day to the Olympics. Irony? As when they had displayed their powers of authority onto innocent weaponless people last time, as they had demonstrate their monstrosity towards their own kin who wishes not to be part of them, now they find themselves aiding those who are in need within their own territory.

Maybe I'm not too clear about the propagandas of China, but I felt that they deserved this, after what happened before that that they had a demonstration and uncivilization caused by the years of studies under the great Mao. Father of communism and scheming scandals. But heck, it made those Chinamen survive; they couldn't live with democracy, they had to live with communism.

Oh right, now I'll turn the bashing to those so-called holy organisations who claims their own right to distribute and deliver warmth to the refugees of Myanmar. Oh how holy you guys are, especially United Nations. They threw away their long-term grudge with Myanmar and came for aid with them. Oh United Nations, we should bow and salute you because of your efforts to get foreign countries and provide a channel for them to aid Myanmar. So noble.

There's nothing noble about some idiots behind a long oval desk that issues commands to workers to distribute "On behalf of your holiness". You have done nothing but shit around the world. Do you make your voices heard when Myanmar unleashed a crackdown on helpless monks? Do you make your voices heard when President Bush wanted to declare war on Iraq and the UN knew FULLY WELL it was the wrong thing to do?

This organisation was none other than a bunch of biased jerks who rely on the dominant economy holder and does nothing but yak yak and yak about peace (what peace? Fuck peace, we all have to defend ourselves), yak about humanitarian shit (but did nothing to stop the violence, what's the matter? Too many beheaded officers from you?), and yak about "global unity". What global unity? We still have stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination at every corner of EARTH!

Seriously, UN, get off the holy ground, no one here can really relate to your issues and propagandas anymore. Countless times I saw your so-called "essay competition" and let those children to unravel their diplomatic self to prove how self-worthy they are. Oh come on, it's just crackpot talk. What kind of compliments you give like "This essay shows essence, depth and true accounts about the World"? Yucks, seriously, you guys are one of the saddest organisations on Earth, who rely on nothing but past glories, and tries to make yourself important, but seriously, who will care what you think?

(Oh, and this applies to all the stupid NGOs out there, locally, who thinks they represent a certain ground of people, when you guys are all only stupid rich tai-tais who went for talks about integrity and civilization when they do nothing but brag about their latest fashion. Get a life, and oh, seriously, learn how to use the computer jackasses)

And I truly believe that your role in the current world is no longer sufficient in the world where individualism rules better than global voice. So please, stop embarassing yourself.

And I will do my part by not donating to these bastards and instead, find my own channel, so that I TRULY know where my aid will go to.

May the Buddha shine light upon you. May HE open a path better for you. May you be able to end suffering, and move on to a better life. Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu.

Memoirs of Langkawi

The sea breeze, the radiance of the sun, the swishing sounds of the waves, and the joys of 8 people running around the island of Langkawi. Oh....and the agony. =.=


Here's why:


Pros of being in Langkawi

- FREEDOM!!!!! Free from the hustle and bustle city life and our parents nagging voices.

- We get to be crazy and be kiddie. We watch morning cartoons everyday for the last five days there, and got addicted to Pucca Animated. We brought stuffed toys just for the hell of it, and all the guys and girls alike all cuddle to fuzzy animals.

- I learnt how to drink alcoholic liquor and knowing fully well my drunken stupor will be, drunken stupor. As in, just being sleepy. And my current favourite is Absolut Raspberry Vodka. =D

- Ephy is so cute that when he sleeps he grunts like he's in a conversation. As in

Ephy: *grunt grunt grunt grunt*

*after short pause*

Ephy: *grunt grunt*

*short pause*

Ephy: *GGGGRRRRRRRRUUUUUUNNNNNNNTTTTTTT*

The last one particularly scared the shit out of me that I ran out of the room to join the others and watch Shrek 2 (yea, more cartoons). But yea, I know Ephy had that grunting problem. Thank god it stopped after he went into the deep sleep phase, unlike snoring. Urgh.

- Island hopping was fun and normal, because I've done it before, and I actually jumped to swim in the Lake of the Pregnant Maiden. No, I'm sure I'm not pregnant. Ephyon and I were clean. Plus, we were too lazy to do anymore strenous activities after all the outdoor ones.

- Erm, camwhores!

- Jump the waves was particularly fun, we were all crazy bastards trying to avoid the waves by jumping over it, and sometimes got hit as well. I did a 360 degrees somersault at the cost of feeling the force of the waves. The pull and push factor does apply here.

- We were all one big happy gang.

But

Cons of being in Langkawi

- We all had a hell of a sunburn. The type that the sun shines over you without
yourself realising it, and by the time you get back your face, shoulders and back hurts like hell. Not to mention they all turn tomato red. Hearing your friends "owww" and "yeowch" the whole night wasn't that great a feeling.

- Overspending. Somehow along the way we have overestimated Langkawi's "Duty Free Zone" prices and didn't bring enough to compensate and made us survive for 5 days, which we did survive eventually.

- While we were jumping the waves, bigger waves came and swept my glasses away. So is Ephy's. We were both half blind until we get back to Kuala Lumpur.

- Spending on cars was a bad idea, but that was the only way to go around in Langkawi.

- We overestimated our body strength and think we can go for a hike of all the seven wells. Crazy, we puffed and panted by the time we stopped at well no. 1. And we didn't went up to second and third.

- My Camera don't have alot of pictures, because I'm a lazy photographer.

Well, that's all I can do to summarise my experience in Langkawi. No doubt we'll not come back here again until we have the sufficient budget to spend. And we are not even sure when is our next trip. But, at least I had fun in this trip. Too bad no one got into a relationship unlike the previous one, because most guys were already taken. ;)

Here's the proof that I've been there:





EAGLES!

Okay, that's all for now. Thanks and good day!

Nostalgia Part 2

Deleted due to boyfriend's impatience. And plus I'm too lazy to update.

Warning: May a guy with the nickname Ephyon please shut up and read through before showing your FF7 fanboyish attitude

Deleted due to boyfriend's impatience. And plus I'm too lazy to continue on.

Various Updates 2

Continued.

Updates on

The First Malaysian Parliament meeting broadcasted live on 30 minutes:

Argh, I missed it! I missed the first meeting ever made with all the Members of the Parliament came in to give various questions about an issue. Because of the friggin finals! argh argh argh! But anyways, it's also good to see it blogged live from Tony Pua and Jeff Ooi. Ah....I really miss them. They did not fail to have some cheekiness put in their blog post. Whee, welcome back to blogging. I miss them and their blogs.

Back on track, nonetheless, the first meeting was, apparently, an ugly attempt by many to try and get the attention on themselves. Of course the best attempt was by Independent candidate Ibrahim Ali from Pasir Mas. I will not mentioned abt him not voting for Tan Seng Giaw as the Deputy Speaker, rather, I will post this:

Ibrahim Ali: I would like to ask the Tuan Speaker that, according to the Point of Order, A MP must first stand up and speak.

Speaker: Yes, correct.

Ibrahim Ali: Then why is it that Bukit Gelugor (Karpal Singh) did not first stand up before he speak? *sits down with a smirk on his face*

*this is translated from the Malay ones I saw on Youtube*

That simple sentence caused an uproar that lasted for 15 minutes, having various protests from the Barisan Rakyat. Why?

Karpal Singh was wheelchair-bound. How can he stand up? That shows a sign of insensitivity towards the handicapped from that blockhead. But, he had made it to the priority list, the one who everyone must look out for.

I don't believe this. Such a petty attempt to be on national television. This is worse than Candid Camera. But the problem with the mainstream media is that they went and feature on other stuff like the funny argument of Big foot and Big monkey, which had been resolved after the parliament meeting. Sheesh. Come on mainstream media, you overwrite the insensitivities and instead concentrate on something that is already resolved outside the Parliament? Where are your true priorities wei?

Sheesh, although on a brighter note, The Malay Mail is no more belong to NSTP. So now we'll have two independent newspapers. Yay, looks like my future gets brighter bit by bit.

Updates on

Rocker Section:

I'm almost done with the Bee Gees and Beatles research, I'll post up one of them one day after I'm finish with my finals. Don't worry, only posts relating to the rocker section will be featured in a subsection which I will create after the post was put up. So just anticipate and wait.

Updates on

Me:

After the finals, I'll be going off to Langkawi to finally have some well deserved R&R with my university coursemates. I can't wait.

I'll be done with my first year degree.

I don't like Nuffnang. You'll know why later when I have the mood.

I'm finally going to publish the email that you guys can use to email profanities at me. Although I doubt any of you wanted to know me anyway. By the way, if you see a guy's name there, that is because I'm using Ephyon's abandonned account which he willingly donates to me. =D

So there, all my updates and my views about the current incidents that had happened recently from last month till now. And again, I'll be missing for another week or so due to many activities that keep rolling on and on. Yay, will try to post beautiful pictures of the majestic island.

Ah well, and at this moment I felt a sense of nostalgia hovering over me the dates back toward the year 2003.

Excuse me, while I go plug in my geekiness completely before I tell you what I was feeling about.

Various Updates 1

Sorry for the long silence. Finals can be a pain in the butt hole if not observed correctly. Therefore I had to forgo this to put time and space for the vigorous studying. And now, with only one paper left, I guess it's time I update on the many interesting things that happened when I'm absent. Damn, why does the good stuff all happened when I'm gone?

Anyways, let the updating marathon begin!

Updates on:

Olympic torch relay run with many many China-Chinese youths (just so not to be confused with the Malaysian Chinese) protecting like a big circle:

Personally, I find that actually makes the China-Chinese into more of a joke than doing something patriotic. These Chinamen all come out to sing pro-China songs, protecting the torch holder, shouting at the pro-Tibet supporters (hey don't worry, I'm flaming both this time because both are such jerks), kicking and hitting elderly pro-Tibet supporters, making sure the handicapped pro-Tibetan supporter does not get his walking stick back. And oh, so many more.

I've been honoured to view the more stupider jokes of these Chinamen like boo-ing their non favourite singer off stage, banning certain actresses and actors, singers, entertainers off China for breaching certain codes of ethics, and so on, but this has got to be the FUCKING joke of all times in the China history. So fine, if you really hated the pro-Tibet supporters who came to express their support for Tibet's independence, sing your stupid National song and get on with the relay, why the hell do you want to hit people? That just shows what kind of so-called morality you had to gang up on women, elderly people and children. Hey, I'm so fucking disgusted to see you guys all taking an elderly man's walking stick away to prevent him from walking properly in Korea. You Chinamen say they are not supposed to mix politics with sports, then what of you guys to mix patriotism with abuse?

So to the "hooligans of China who claims to be patriotic", fuck you man. And to those who never stopped these youths, fuck you too. No one, not even Confucius said that you should bully an elderly man or a woman like that. Let the police do their job. It's not for you to do it for them. Damn, if I were the police I'd arrest both the Tibetan hooligan and the China hooligan, who cares if the Chinese government will give amounts of pressure, it's still justice.

And to those pro-Tibetan supporters, you are no better, we understand that Tibet needs all the support to claim their independence, but mixing an Olympic torch relay, which was supposed to be a national event with your international remise is just a no-no. Let the nation run with the torch la wei. The torch has done nothing wrong to you. It's just an object and symbol of sports. Not a crazy weapon of mass destruction that you must defuse before it explodes. Come on, it's such a crazy thing to play up this event into something that needs severe protection and high end security.

I really feel my blood boil witnessing the torch relay run happening in Malaysia, it becomes too much of a stupid event than a significant event. Right, it could be the Western media's problem of playing up the "big brother" role and scrutinising the Chinese government. Then these Chinamen should at least ACT LIKE A FIRST CLASS CITIZEN, rather giving the Western media MORE CHANCES to poke at you guys like clowns.

And Congratulations, the whole world is now going to look down at the Asians over their inability to even tolerate the small amount of supporters compare to you horde of cows youths.

Updates on

the Malaysian Dreamgirl saga:

Ah yes, this whole thing was never mentioned before in my blog because I didn't want to step into the entertainment circle. In fact, I suck at writing entertainment stuff, as seen in previous post when I try to crack up jokes about celebrity sex tapes. Not working. However, this Malaysian Dreamgirl, looked, set, and poised to be one of the most happening, the best, and overall, one reality tv show that will make Malaysians planting a new chapter in internet technology.

NOT!

What made it setback was that the judges, I'm sorry but why is it the judges had no say in the competition? Sure I mean Kenny had the chance to tell us they were judging photos at the one time of the post and then nothing was heard of after that. What more when they really have lousy editing skills. It's almost like they only want the juicy bits but the boring sequence not in. Aiyoh, what makes the programme interesting is the flow, not the juice. So come on, we need to see something customary in there. Other than girls yakking and complaining about everything else.

And the "It's not a model competition it's a vote for my favourite girl" sms competition. My god, from that onwards I swear I was looking at the "Akademi Fantasia fandomness" appearing in all Malaysian who were unwilling to letting their favourite girl leave. I'm sure in weeks to come the same bunch of people will fall for the sms scams designed to meet up with the girls and you can get to meet up with them upclose personal by smsing your bank account to the scam rings. Whee.

Of coure things are also not peaceful in the blogosphere when the Malaysian Dreamgirl actually had the contest of having the funniest bitchiest post on the internet, and ALL the female bloggers were vying for that stupid two invites to witness a "grand" finale held in the public which we could also drive by to look. Sheesh. And I sincerely thought that they meant to bitch. Till I saw the fox.

Yay for me because I finally found a blogger that I like, without having a bloody "I serve Nuffnang" thingamajigs at the side of the blog.

So in the end, my end conclusion is that, it did made a step into online reality tv, but it was only a small step. They should treat this tv production as serious as their own available in any local tv stations we find. Because hey, isn't this what you want? But in the end it became a flop for a first bad season. But honestly, I do not want this to end, because this one has potential to be better.

Any comments on the Malaysian Dreamgirl winner? Nope. I do have some comments on her father. Dude, you are to blame if your daughter was called bitchy. You sounded bitchy yourself. Suing the company for something so puny. Please la. That makes you sound cahoots rather than being reasonable. Ah well. Spoilt brat and unreasonable father makes a winner. That's all.

...To be continue in next post before my blog post becomes too long.

I LOL-ed, LMAO-ed, and getting Pissed Off. And LOL-ed again.

Today was a shocker.

Huhu, why the heck does my family even subscribed to this silly newspaper that claims to be *raises two fingers at each hand and make wriggling motions* "The people's paper"?

Especially with their phrase called "According to some blogs" without any links?

A swift check towards all famous political blogs and I see nothing around.

Another swift check, and I found one in Rocky bro, and even then do I found a link to it. Click Original Source HERE. (and This is only one blogger, where are the other blogs?? Oh wait, according to Rocky, they took the comments out from that very same blog and name it as other blogs. What a disgrace.)

I wonder if the blogger would be a little pissed off. I sure would. Having such a credible newspaper to take out your blog post like that and not even giving you a nice credit. (aka linking you). What idiots. I bet they were too afraid by the PPPA perhaps that they had forgotten the fundamentals of attributing? And what the heck? A blog is public to everyone, so it is alright to just put the link there. Maybe they are afraid of the blogger getting more popularity than the newspaper itself.

And when I read the newspaper I thought it could be a BN insider because that newspaper was afraid to quote anyone in it. Of course I'd apologise for my misake, but then I realised that mistake before I post this. So, lalala, take that!

I really grew disappointed with this newspaper. Gone were the glory days when they ACTUALLY made real sense out of news making (note, Iraqi war and personal experiences), actually GOING around finding articles (Okay, I won't pin down on Startwo for this, kudos on their insights on the Tibetan rebellions), rather NOW when they only sit back, and fabricate their stories and quoting blogs as "anonymous sources".

Come on, be practical the mainstream media, blogs are MEANT for you to read, it's okay linking them, and emailing the said blogger for attribution. If we only want it to be heard within ourselves, we'll have a DIARY. Not a BLOG for all to READ. Right?

Sure, the bloggers MAY be anonymous, but if they put their emails there it is OKAY to find them. (Which got me thinking if I need to put my email on this blog)

Or maybe you just want to made blogs look bad again? So that politicians around can go back to not blogging after finding it such a tedious job to put in their very cramped schedule. The politicians will have another say by me after this because I can't stand the fact that they start putting up blogs only for show and not even putting any real post with news value. Like trying to find Opposition MPs that actually bribe? Wait? Don't have? Putting your personal on the blog even? Cannot?

Then don't be a blogger if that's the case. So just because the tsunami of internet ruled over your stupidity of controlling the one side of mainstream media, and you might get a reverse tsunami the next round. No freaking way will that happen when your mentality is that small.

Instead of that, try taking the bus, without the media presence or the train and feel for yourself the lives WE have to live each and any other day rather than sitting there wondering what do bloggers do to earn a place in the Parliament with the aid of Internet.

Oh wait, I think I'm digressing. Whoops.

Go back to that particular newspaper, I feel safe to say that coming this end of the year, I shall not go to that particular newspaper for internship. Sure I've heard of the payment there, and how good it is, but their command of language is laughable, their attributions are almost a joke, and they did not even verify their facts. Laziness domination perhaps? Or maybe too much pressure from every side to touch anything called "truth", "accuracy", and "public accountability"?

The Star, you have alot to explain about your lacklustre performance. After a new PM comes in, I see nothing but deterioration. What happened?

Is this the so-called Freedom of press?

Explain or continue to be laughed at. My respect for you is running thin. Really thin.

[Update at 8.05pm: Well it seems the website was rather quick to put up the original blog post. Well then, I hope that The Star would have had a better attribution next time, don't think that bloggers are "buffoons"]

Tea House Moon - Enya

- Reminds me of cats (cause of YinJiun )

-Reminds me of dad

-Reminds me of peace and tranquility

-Reminds me of the countless hours I spent just looking at the moon

-Reminds me of relaxation (sorely needed)

-Reminds me of the inner me

-Reminds me of being me

-Reminds me of being romantic to Ephyon

-Reminds me of the waltz we made in an old playground

-Reminds me of the happy carefree times together

-Reminds me of cats (again)

Somehow, it'll always be associated with cats. But anyways, study week. Everything's vulnerable. Including me. Ciao.

I'm thinking of...

Starting a Section.

Just talking only about Rock bands.

Yep, I felt that after 2 years of blogging I should start paying tributes to rock bands I love and would like to have them known again. And having to actually conduct research for each rock bands and their songs, depicting each evolution. And in every rock band I researched, I would post a question at the end, and present my own opinions about how their songs changed from time to time. Don't worry, the question will be the same.

The Rocker Chick in Me, really wishes to express and do something about showing what real rock is. Which is why I will go and dig out songs from the past, with the aid of Wikipedia, and Youtube. I admit some of these epic songs is only known to me ONLY recently, due to my lack of exposure to real rock until much recently. (well, ever since I start university, which is, 2 years ago, ironic?). Well I do get exposed to rock, but embracing it was a totally different thing altogether.

So yeah, that is what I planned, and this will take some time. I need to hear from you guys about it first, whether personally or not. Note, I'd first start from the Western rock bands, then moved to maybe Taiwan and Japanese rock bands. So be patient for those who support bands from the Orient land.

Bands that are to be start research on: Bee Gees (They started out as a rock band mind you), Queen, Beatles.

Recent bands to be start research on: So far, maybe Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Good Charlotte, My Chemical Romance.

So just tell me what do you think? Is it worth continuing? Cause I noticed hip hop is what the young ones embracing right now, but I just want to do my part and just write something cool about Rock.

Please tell me ya?