Blogger Exclusive 1: Craze vs Sanity

Hey everyone, my blogging activites have to come to a hold. I won't be blogging for quite some time, I don't know how long will it be before I come back again. Anyways, I've come up with my Blogger Exclusive! Which I will blog not on one article, but two. So I hope that you readers out there are satisfied with my topics. Leave some comments, or just keep supporting me, I will keep posting my opinions on this blog.

I finally realise that after months of arguing, I have come to a conclusion: my sister has spread her wings even though she's not ready for it. She's trying to become a woman. A woman who is feminine, who sprays perfume on herself so she can smell nice, a woman who would spend hours doing her hair so she stands out when she's in a crowd. A woman who would rather sacrifice her eyes than to wear her spectacles, just because she wants to look beautiful, so on and so forth.

Countless times I have express my dissatisfaction towards her change in taste. Before that she wasn't that serious. Vain she may be, she never craved for materials like perfumes or makeup. We can still be crazy enough to crack jokes at almost everyone. But as time passed, she doesn't hang around with me anymore, and that becomes obvious after I had started working part time, and then, enrolling in university. I still maintain myself, being paranoid at the wrong times, fool around with anyone that are my friends, and simply, joking around with my bunch of friends. I felt happy because I've been able to portray myself, whether it is with my family or my friends. But my sister doesn't find that amusing, and I don't find hers interesting either. In the end, we had an argument, and it has been a week since I had a proper communication with her.

I blame her change onto her boyfriend, her classmate in school. It was his presence that made her change the way she is now. But I'm very disappointed, why is she rushing to grow up? Why does she want to be so advanced in looks, way further in her time? Still, I couldn't blame her or her boyfriend much. She will become distant sooner or later. And there I was, pledging that us siblings will not fall apart. How foolish I was. And stupid it is to maintain "maturity" on the outside. What about the insides? I can say that she is not matured enough to even face the outside world, what more can I say?

The one part that I hate, and I think everyone hates, is growing up. People expects you to act your age. I'm 18 now, so I should act like an 18-year-old. But how should an 18-year-old act like? After much thinking, they would say, "you can start by eliminating your childish ways,". Okay, but I've seen people older than me, acting like a idiot, anymore explanations? Another long thinking, they would say, "be yourself"

There you have it, be yourself. If being childish is your way of portraying your inner self, then do it, but not to point of irritating others. It is always okay to wear a mask when you are with others. And some, apparently, wears their masks at everyone, only to reveal their true self only to those really close to them. But they will be trapped in the multiple personalities that they have conducted, and in the end they will go insane. Why bother to cover so much, when you can just show your true self? No one is going to hate you because they didn't know who are you in the first place. And maybe they can accept you better.

To me, I can only maintain my own identity by becoming who I am truly. Friends and family would give me advices on how should I act time after time, but I still remain the same way. I guess they wanted to look at me at a different viewpoint, but I'm not ready to change. Will they even see the difference even if I had made a change? To those who are sharp, maybe; to those who are not, they won't. I don't know, but I like being me now. I maybe crazy, but I still have my principles in life. I have my own serious opnions on different issues. Still, I believe I'm still sane in a way that I don't lose any of my self image.

I may be exaggerating abit, because I don't want to see anyone change like my sister. I prefer slow changes, not a sudden change. To tell you readers a truth, I miss my old sister alot. If there is any way to get her back, I would, but if her current self is what she truly is, I have nothing to say except to regret I never spend enough time interacting with her.

Thanks and good day.