They are torn between truth and false

Journalists. They have the right to portray the truth. They are the ones spreading the news. They have an important role in mass communication. But they are still controlled by the management. The editors and chief editors.

What happen in China Press is probably the worst journalist attacks in Malaysia. They say that the woman in that Nude Squat Case is a girl from China. They have damaged the diplomatic relationship between China and Malaysia. In the end, the editor and chief editor step down from their position because this is false. That's the reality to it. News can really hurt someone. And some of the times, the news is really annoying. Often a few times I felt that The Star is really wanting more reputation than seeking the truth. Putting a Lebanese "millionaire" on the front page for so many days. Who cares of that idiot anyway? I don't know about the rest of the Malaysians, but I do not want to know what happen to him. Just let him live his life okay? Speaking of that, it reminds me of a taiwan news where an abandonned girl was found and her mother is nonetheless the worst looking Hsu Chun Mei (purely beautiful). They portrayed her for a fare few days, and now she's an artiste? I felt sick. This is disgrace!

I heard the radio today. There's this woman, she said that journalists are always caught in a dilemma. They can always choose to tell the truth. But still, it's not up for them to decide that their news can be shown. I think the editor's room has the most fights of all. Journalists want to show the world the truth, but the editor cares about how much profits that the news company earned. I wonder is my choice a correct one. Maybe it's a correct one. But I definitely cannot stay in Malaysia. I will strong object Malaysia's speaking rights. Whenever I want to spread the truth or false, it will still be against the law. I really have no more comments on how the Malaysian Government made their laws. That is why you will not see me in politics. I'll sure condemn the Government.

This may be me avoiding myself. I always like to know the truth more than lies. Even though the truth hurts so much. I know, my heart may not be able to accept the truths everywhere. Because every truth I accept, it'll be like a cut in my heart, bleeding. That is why I prefer to become a Journalist. I write the stories of others, not mine. The more the reality sinks in, the more I struggle. I hate changes that happen in my life. Like when I was 13 years old, I hate myself because I couldn't adapt to the secondary school lifestyle. Those haunting images of primary school kept coming back. And I'm now in university. Thanks to everyone, I don't have any haunting images in secondary school, and I'm very happy in university.

Maybe, by spreading the truth to others, the others will accept reality even better. Maybe, by knowing more truths, I can accept reality easily. And, maybe, those scars in my heart will heal itself. Let journalists have air to breathe. Let them not be torn. Let me be a successful journalist and change what I don't like about mass communication in the near future. Thanks and good day.

I will keep my promise.

How many people(especially girls) had got hurt for that sentence? I don't know. How many children had cried over disappointment because parents didn't fulfil that sentence? I don't know. How many people had attacked the government because of that sentence given out by the president? I don't know.

Promise. What kind of word is this? Who had invented it? Does he or she know that this word has give a lot of pain to the people here? Does he or she know, that once upon a time, I got hurt of that word? My friends who have fall in love too cry because of a promise. I sometimes wonder what more powers it had in this word : promise.

Come to think of it. No one should give a promise openly. Sure, a promise can secure someone's hope, but what if those hopes are not true? People will just crumble over that. Promise, a mask of a smiling face, when this world have been crying with all the stupidity that mankind had did to it! Promise, a man's strategy to make his girl sleep with him! Promise, another strategy of parents to quiet down their children! Why the hell do promise exist?

I pray my future partner will not keep any promise. Even if he did, I pray that I don't care of it. I got so hopeless on promises, I don't give a damn anymore. It's better this way, not keeping any promises, and in return I have surprises. I'm just like that. I don't care. Which is why I'm not the type of girl that men are searching. I'm strong, maybe, too strong. But I really don't care, just as much as I don't care about promises.

Promises, I pray that they don't exist. Thanks and good day.

Stand Up Girls!

Today, I've come across a newspaper article, where they featured about Saudi Arabian journalistsdoing their everyday interviews. Now before you leave the post, these people are women journalists. In Muslims countries like the Saudi Arabia, there is a different status between men and women. Women couldn't expose their face for the fear that they will seduce men. And they couldn't really walk out of their office without being inspected by the authority. They have to think and act like snakes, thinking of ways to avoid such happenings. And it got me thinking, things have never change.

Women fighting for their rights are considered a sin. They cannot speak out on how much discrimination that they have suffered. That is because in the world of 2006, this is still a world dominated by men. Even if there are women presidents, like Gloria Arroyo, people still doubt whether do they really have the capability to lead the country to become a developed country. Why the doubt? Hasn't the equality between men and women established some time ago? Hasn't women proved that they can win men over by their brains, instead of strength? I admit, women do lack in strength, but what about mental strength? Are men capable of handling their problems while juggling with daily career life?

There are many women in this world that I admire, but I will be talking about a women columnist, Chong Seau Ching. She first inspired me to travel the world, but with a purpose. She told stories of how she met different women in different places, and how they were educated by officers who try to make womens' life better. She got herself married, and she had a daughter. But luck was not beside her as she later divorced her husband. And she spent her later years as a single mother and a homemaker. She still continues to write in her column. But she uses this opportunity to promote the devastating situation of single mothers in Malaysia. I find her columns always a good read. Because she has inspired me to support women's rights. I learn to fight and not let men look down at women. But I too will not overabuse my rights. Because there must have respect between the two genders.

I pray that the women journalists in Saudi Arabia will escape from the discrimination cycle very very soon. Not only Saudi Arabia, even here in Malaysia, those women who were taught that they are weak and the men are strong, it's time to change. We are not in the world where men are the only ones that rule. Women rule too. But please don't be too stupid to play around. You might end up in a very dangerous situation. Be who you want to be, and support the women everywhere. I'm sure that there are some black sheeps around who thinks that being a women you must satisfy the men. But I don't think so, I'll survive without men if I never fall in love, because I'm a GIRL! We are fighters for women's right. So girls, Stand Up!!! Thanks and good day.

Malaysians...

Independence Day is coming. It is always celebrated with colours, fireworks, and most importantly, the final countdown. It brought tears to the old, and the happiness to the young, because of the prospect of a public holiday. But wait, what about the middle class? Teenagers and young adults?

We would be happy because we can finally relax from those hectic schedule. Exams, assignments, projects, meetings, the activities are endless. But at the same time we might groan. Why does the government think that we don't love the country? I love Malaysia a lot. But still, compare to other countries, Malaysia has a lot of aspects that needs improving.

Since young we have been taught to say "please, excuse me, thank you, sorry". And look at what happen now. It's a disgrace to see adults older than us pushing like mad cows just to get out the bus. And while all of us were taught to give our seats to elderly people, some people would rather SHARE a seat then giving the whole seat to them. I cannot imagine how can the elderly sit between two people. It saddens me, especially since we are so much younger and we can't speak out. So all these times, those so-called moral education is fake?

I was happy that my brother can mix very well with other races. But sometimes, he played too much, so my mother restricts him from playing too much. Still, whenever I see my brother playing football with his neighbourhood friends, I smiled. There's still hope for the young ones after all. But I hope my brother knows that there's a deeper meaning to their bond, more than just gathering to play football and playing PlayStation 2. But my brother is still young. Let him grow to learn the true beauties of Malaysia.

I myself learn that there is no such thing as discrimination against other races. We can't just left people out of activities just because they do not know our mother tongue or language. Why not use that opportunity to improve our English or Malay or other languages? I privately do not agree to create a barrier between races. I always try to talk to my group mates from other race as much as possible. Sure, I do feel comfortable speaking in Mandarin, but that doesn't mean that I'll abandon English. After all, English is, and still remains, my favourite language. It's my language from birth.

I love being a Malaysian. Even though many expressed their disappointments on the progression of Malaysians. But all I can say is, no matter where I am, I will always support Malaysia. And yes, if there is a need, I will too state how disappointed I am towards Malaysian government. Hoping they might know of this Chinese proverb " Water can bring a boat to safety, but it also could sink that boat." Thanks and good day. And hope everyone have a Great Independence Day. Love Malaysia, even though I'm not in a patriotic mood.

Amazing blogs, amazing titles, different point of views, different perspectives.....

I've come across a blog that is featuring what Malaysia's tertiary education looked like now. And I was surprised that my university was mentioned. I've read through the whole article, and even some of the reader's comments. They are lamenting what private and public universities that had set their goals for quantity and not quality. From past the few months that I had been in the university, apart from problematic lecturers, my whole life so far had been good.

I've learned that taking up responsibilities are not exactly easy as it seems. When people recommend you to do something, you just take it. Because you want to be the trustworthy one. This will enhance your pavement to a successful career. But in that process you do noticed that it is really hard being in an important role. But what can you do? Abandon it by telling them you can't face the pressure? We can't, because lecturers and everyone around are treating us like adults. But sadly, some still behave like a child and expects spoonfeeding. With such behaviour, do you think the education system has improved? Hardly, and I felt like I'm back at secondary school where the teacher nags and the students daydream.

I've learned that in the university, you truly have to depend on yourself. Neither on books nor the internet, but your determination to succeed. If you don't have the willingness to continue on, what's the use of continuing your studies? Why fight for something unimportant when you should compete and achieve the best that you can? I know people have many controversial issues on how the government should operate the country. But who are you to complain when they have a much better education background? I would say, concentrate on the studies, be who you want to be, and set your mind straight. I do have the dream of changing the mindset of Malaysians to look at Journalism in a different point of view. Many would follow, but I object. I'm not trying to change the tradinational, just merely modernising it. The same goes to my personal life and how I look on the aspects of Love and Life. We don't have to drown, because on the olden days Man had the ability to float. So why not, we see love at the same way?

I've learned that friends from different family backgrounds grows within me. I know, that sometimes people from different races actually could bring me a different point on view on understanding their cultures. But sadly, it is kind of a controversy. Some friends wants you to stay by their side forever. So when they see you befriending a new girl, they tend to get angry. Or they might be angry because you befriended someone from a different race. But we are all adults now aren't we? There will be a time where we have to separate from each other, and that too, doesn't mean it is the end of your friendship with others. Since technology is so advanced, make use of that technology. Keep in touch often, and you will never be alone.

I've learned that language is very important especially staying in this multi-racial country. I don't exactly felt proud, but I do have the ability to maintain both my english and my chinese. Coming from an English speaking background, and being enrolled into a Chinese primary school, I'm sure I felt left out in the first few years because of my funny pronunciation in mandarin and my weak essay writing in chinese. But somehow, I've managed to find my chinese roots when I went to secondary school. And I must say, I didn't regret having an English speaking background and a Chinese primary education. At the very least, I see problems in two ways. One being the Western way, and the other being the Eastern way. This helps me find a solution by repeatingly reviewing both thoughts of mine.

So much I want to learn. So much I want to see. I've attempted to maintain the balance of my life since 18 years ago. Well, now I'm 18 years of age. I may be young, but I still check on the latest updates, maybe from the source of newspapers, maybe from the internet. But whatever knowledge I've absorbed I tend to apply on different fields. Only time will tell if we the young Malaysians can make a difference. And, no more referring to us as the "future aspiring leaders of tomorrow". We don't want that label and pressure. We are just normal youngsters. Maybe a minority would want to serve the government, but for us common teenagers, we just want to fulfil the dreams that we have made. Thanks and good day.

Storylines from the big screen

"Yo ho Yo ho A pirate's life for me" "I'm a King of the WORLD!" "You had me at hello"
Quotations from famous movies. And just recently I had enjoyed watching the second instalment of the famous Pirates of The Caribbean trilogy. Movies, from the olden times to now, it never fails to impress audiences. "Gone with the Wind" is still the talk within the elderly folks (with much despair from the younger generation). I myself really took in my first breath of what movies are like, when I watched Titanic. I was only 9 alright? But then the hobby of going out for movies don't seem to grow within me. Maybe it's my family habits, but I still will go for a movie or two. Just that it's not going to be my favourtie pastime. I find movies kind of really nice, but not so detailed. But then again, maybe that's just me.

I would always catch up with the Academy Awards every year whenever I can. Not only do I get to know the movies that are nominated (and surprisingly, always banned in Malaysia), I get to hear the songs. I especially like the part where they give entertainment to the audience through singing, even though it's a movie award. Movie soundtracks are always worth a listen, especially blockbusters. What's a good movie without music? And what's a good movie without good actors? Oh please, I get so bored watching the same faces again and again and again. Can't they just move aside and let the new stars grow? I want to see more of the new breed. Orlando Bloom, Josh Hartnett (where is that cutie?), Jake Gyllenhaal, Heath Ledger, Scarlett Johansson, Keira Knightley(not many female new stars), Elijah Wood (another cutie that had disappeared after The Lord of The Rings).

I think that's all. I can't think of more to say because busy with my assignments lately. Or not it would have been another of my writing masterpieces. Thanks and good day.

Simple and complicated....

It's so amazing how simple stories can be conducted in the this now-full-of-gadgets world. A little girl wanting only just flowers for her mother. A boy helpfully picks his friend up from the ground after a ball game. A smile from an elderly folk. I sometimes wonder why do we think the complicated way when things are just so simple? In a way, einstein, edison and the rest of the scientist thinks that by thinking at the difficult side, we can achieve more.

But really, thinking at that side, does it really bring you happiness? Working on your so-called devious plans to change the world and all along, you've changed yourself? Working so hard to contribute to the nation, when your family are all contributing to you? I shudder to think how one's heart can be sealed at the sight of fame and fortune, and how ignorant one can be after they have booze, women, cars, house, career, name.

Maybe it's me, but I really couldn't live the life of an ignorant corporate. Those guys that cover the highlights of newspaper. When will they know shame? Don't they have a family to keep? I just cannot think of what will I be if I abandon my family, the best family I have known, after my father's death. My cute grandparents, my lovely mother, my love hate relationship with my siblings, my relatives....it's endless. I cherish my family more and more now. Maybe it's the feeling of home sweet home. Okay, maybe there are some people out there that oppose me. Before you could say anything, I have a "dare to dream" attitude. I'll push forward my dreams and realise them. But I will never put my family aside just to pursue my dreams. They are the ones that let me dream.

In a complicated world like this, sometimes, being simple is not exactly beneficial. But at the very least, it keeps your heart pure, it keeps your mind in place, it is those things that remind you that this complicated world still has some beauty in it. Thanks and good day.

Random thoughts....

People can just be very abstract about themselves. They lash at the people they hate in their imaginery world or they would think of the impossible. Kissing Brad Pitt? Get real! Thinking of someone who has a girlfriend? Go to hell. But what the heck, people just can't let imaginations run wild, or not it would have been a big disaster. Which is why the choice of being rational or being psychopathic still remains one of the hottest debate that has yet to find a solution. To me, I say, just have both. As long as we can balance and control both extremes, a little craze won't hurt.

And now, I would like to share a little bit of my random thoughts, my day had been filled with anguish on finishing the exams and there are more to come. So i just suddenly had this feeling to write out a random story. It won't be complete and it probably never will. Please enjoy :

"She exposed herself to the sky, where the soft wind carressed her face. She was enjoying the moment of appreciating the scenery in front of her. She skipped around happily, playing with the sand, walking the dog, smiling and laughing like a little girl. He gazed at her from far, smiling, relieved that she knows how to appreciate everything around her. But he felt grief, because he knew this is the last time he'll ever see her smile like that. Silently, he began to let his tears flow. He wasn't going to hide it this time. She stopped because she saw his tears. He just gave her a little smile, saying that these are tears of joy. But he was foolish. There's nothing that he can hide from the sweet girl in front of him. She reached out to touch his face. She sensed sadness and anger, and she cried with him. 'What is it? What is it that you are hiding from me? Tell me, Tell me now!'. But he looked at her eyes again, those ruby red eyes. He can't, he just can't......."

There, that should leave a cliche for you guys. Interpret your own endings. Would like to hear from you all soon. Thanks and good day.

Dearly Beloved, My Sanctuary, Suteki Da Ne, To Zanarkand.....

Imagine when you are alone, without anyone to be with you. Imagine you are down, without anyone to help you. Imagine you are in danger, without anyone to save you. All these imaginations had compiled into becoming some of the nicest game music that you can ever find. I believe that game music is really worth a listen, because it portrays the characters and their feelings. Like for me, I always ponder on the music and the story first before I start to play a certain game, because I think that the music brings out the mood for gamers to play. And I always, ALWAYS, salute the music composers who had done a great job in trying to give character developments to the game with their magical touch on the music.

I always think that the Japanese are really superb into composing music for gamers. Something which the Americans lack, even they are better in promoting and distribution. How did they ever understand the feelings of the main character? Game characters are just a couple of computer pixels put together, or just a piece of artwork on paper. Yet the musicians can give these characters a mood or a situation where even the gamers can adapt to. Slowly, because of the power of music, these game characters began to grow inside the gamers and they become an icon. I won't ever want to touch a game that has bad music, or even worse, no music at all. Which is why I love the game, and what's more, I would try my best to find the music that I want because it is worth listening again and again. And I do not need to start the game to listen to it all the time. This is what technology is about.

Has anyone tried crying in front of the TV screen because they had finished a certain game? I did, and it was partly because of the sad ending, and also partly because of the game music. Music is something that takes time for us to consume, and as we progress into the story (or the game), we became more adapt to the environment of the game. By the time the story ends, we can't help but feel sad because a new adventure has came to an end(replaying is not an adventure but just a repeat to make sure everything is in the right order). So in ther near future, I'll try to post up some of the game music. Then, you guys can judge yourself whether are game music a kind of music that not only suits the moods of human being, but also a theme for game characters. Lastly, just let me try to entertain you guys with this sentence :

*He looked at her for a long time, she didn't make the slightest movement. Then all of a sudden, he gave her a kiss, right at her lips. Like they were sealed together. She still didn't make any movement, but her mind was clear. She felt pleasure. He smirked quietly inside. Another girl down.*

Intriguing right? Let me hear some comments. Thanks, and good day.

First

The very first wild thought that came to my mind today. Is there really an angel for everyone? My meaning of an angel is not the kind that saves the world, but the ones that give true happiness to the people beside them. Angels are people who take care of us even they do not have any blood relation with us. In other words, a soulmate is an angel.
I hoped for an angel to save me. An angel who can understand without needing me to speak out, because sometimes it's frustrating to tell someone that you are unhappy. But that was what I hoped, and I end up in a midst of getting a fit because I can't find the angel. It's as if I've had terminal cancer and I only have a few days to live. So I must live my life completely by finding someone to stay with until the day I die. I didn't think on something that stupid now. But still I believe an angel is there for everyone.
Dear angel, I don't know who you are, or where you might be in now. But all I know is that even though how much I enjoy my life now, whenever I feel moody my heart lingers on you. Angel, I wonder how long do I have to wait until you came into my life. I know now that you are stilling watching after me, somewhere, thinking it is not ready to approach me yet, because I have other goals in my life. It's true, my main goal is not to find you my angel. It is to achieve an education level good enough so I could be in the adult field, the community, the nation. But do not fret my angel. I still think about you, wondering how you might look like, thinking of how will you care for me in the future. Even thought I know this is not the time for this kind of rift raft. Angel, I want to know what it feels like to be loved by you, the angel of my life. I don't know how to say the words, but you must know the way I feel. Because love is not a feeling that needs to be said to be true. Angel, if you are smiling now, please, tell me. So I can smile with you too.

A moment with the readers: Whatever that I've type here might just be a random of letting out my feelings, so don't take my post regarding about how much I want to find a guy seriously. Because seriously, I'm happy with what I am. It's just that sometimes my thoughts will go wild. Hence, my blog title. Just have fun readers. Enjoy my wild side. B)